


Never Let Go

by jonsasnow



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Dydia, F/M, Season 4 Rewrite
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-16 02:35:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5810254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jonsasnow/pseuds/jonsasnow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The nightmares are becoming more and more frequent and Lydia's worried of what they could mean. Last time she had such vivid nightmares, she had been used and manipulated by Peter Hale. However, at least this time, it's Allison that stars in them and she seems determined to tell Lydia something. If only Lydia could figure it out. </p><p>Emotions are easy to smell if one knew how to differentiate between them. Grief is pungent and thick and Derek can smell it rolling off of Lydia in waves. He's determined not to care but she had saved him once and he feels an unfortunate debt to her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Preface

In some miraculous turn of events, a whole week had passed since Lydia’s seen her own reflection. It hadn’t been some conscious decision on her behalf. She hadn’t even been aware of the change till she caught her reflection in the long mirror sitting atop her vanity. The flicker of red was what drew her and then slowly as her face came into view, Lydia paused. The hazel eyes looking back at her were her own, as was the slight curvature of her nose and the long red hair, but Lydia couldn’t shake the feeling of unfamiliarity. The eyes held none of the light and sparkle that made Lydia who she was. They were cold and demanding but what they were asking of her, Lydia didn’t know. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know either.

With one trembling finger, she picked at a strand of hair and watched it fall limp and lifeless back against her shoulder. This wasn’t her. This wasn’t who she had spent seventeen long years perfecting. This _thing_ staring back at her was a farce of the Lydia Martin that commanded the attention of her peers wherever she went. This person was pathetic.

Her mother had taught her to be beautiful.

Her father had taught her to be bold.

But what Lydia was now coming to realise as she continued to stare at her own reflection was that life had taught her to be weak.

A sob broke through without warning. Lydia’s knees wobbled and she crumpled slowly to the floor in a heap of limbs and self-pity. Tears fell quickly down her pallid skin and Lydia didn’t bother to wipe them away anymore. This was familiar. Grief was an ache that she could at least understand, and there on the floor of her bedroom, Lydia cried. She cried for Aiden and she cried for Allison.

She cried till there was no moisture left behind her dull eyes and all her body had left was to lull her into sleep’s welcoming embrace.

But escape even in her unconscious was not a privilege awarded to Lydia Martin.

 

*********

 

If Stiles continued to fidget anymore, Lydia might be the one to kill him. It had been a long journey and she could do with some peace and quiet. She reached over and placed a hand on his knee that was neither comforting nor affectionate. It was a warning. Stiles stopped tapping his leg and gave her a pointed look.

“What?” Lydia asked with narrowed eyes.

“ _What_? What! Why is no one else freaking out about the fact that we -” Stiles started to say but Scott quickly smacked him in the gut. Stiles let out a rush of air. “Hey! What was that for?”

“For someone so smart, you really are an idiot,” Lydia murmured. Stiles turned to look at her with another glance but this one was laced with bewilderment. She jerked her head towards the boy sitting beside her and she emitted a low growl of her own. To Stiles’ credit, he nodded in sudden understanding and remained silent for the remainder of the journey.

She knew they weren’t being altogether very subtle but there was simply no easy way to address the elephant in the room when said elephant was still there.

Lydia laid her head against the windowpane and felt the exhaustion of the day fall swiftly over her. Sleep was easy to come by but she feared it. The nightmares were becoming more frequent and she was scared of what that could mean. As a banshee, Lydia knew better than to dismiss subconscious thoughts as merely just the psyche manifesting her innermost desires and fears. After having Peter Hale terrorise her mind for too many months, she was worried that these nightmares could lead to a similar outcome.

Yet still, fearful or not, sleep came.

_Everything around her fell into the darkness and Lydia stood alone in the middle of the woods behind Beacon Hills. Wind whipped her hair angrily around her face and Lydia shivered but she wasn’t sure if it was just because of the drop in temperature. Something was watching her in the darkness. She could feel its eyes moving as she moved and she knew that running was futile._

_Lydia turned and there in the shadows were two red eyes staring back at her. A snarl echoed in the empty woods. She wanted to move but her legs felt like jelly and she remained rooted to the spot. Maybe now death was calling for her. Lydia didn’t want to die but she didn’t know what to do. Supernatural as she may be, Lydia was useless in a fight. She couldn’t fend for herself. All she brought was death and maybe it was time she brought it right back to her._

_A rustle of leaves and Lydia braced herself._

_The dark beast lunged at her throat but it never reached her because suddenly she was being pulled urgently through the woods. Lydia looked from her hand to the hand that gripped hers and gasped._

_“Allison?”_

_“You have to keep running, Lydia!” Allison was shouting, her voice haggard and sharp. “You can’t stop running!”_

_Her legs were not as long as Allison’s and Lydia struggled to keep up. When finally the unfamiliar physical exertion caught up to her, Lydia went careening into the mud-soaked earth. Allison rushed to her side. “Are you hurt? Can you still run?” Lydia nodded but her mind was dazed. She reached out tentatively to touch Allison’s face, needing to feel for herself that she was real. The other girl’s face softened and her hand shot up to hold tightly onto Lydia’s wrist. “Now’s not the time, Lydia.”_

_“But you’re really here. You’re really alive.”_

_“I’m…” But her words were cut short as the beast burst through the thicket of trees. Allison jumped to attention and unsheathed her bow and arrow quickly. She let loose a volley of arrows into the beast’s chest but it did nothing to deter it. It only made it angrier._

_Allison turned to Lydia and shouted: “Run!”_

_But Lydia couldn’t. She stared in fixed horror as the beast raised one large paw and swiped at Allison, ripping her throat out in one effective swoop. Lydia screamed as Allison’s body dropped lifeless to the ground. She rushed to her side and tears began falling heavily down her face._

_“No, no, no, not again. Please. Not again.”_

“Lydia, Lydia!”

Eyes suddenly flying open, Lydia started and stared perplexedly at Stiles. He looked at her with a mixture of concern and curiosity. “Are you okay?”

Lydia nodded mutely.

“Well, we’re twenty minutes from Deaton’s. We can drop you off at home after we get - uh, Derek settled.”

Lydia nodded again and when Stiles turned back to the front, she attempted to move her body so she could switch to a much more comfortable position. That’s when she realised that her hand was gripping tightly onto someone else’s. Lydia looked down warily to find her fingers interlocking with that of young Derek’s. Lydia snatched her hand back abruptly, feeling as if she had been burnt from the intimacy and the movement caused Derek to open his eyes slowly. He noticed instantly the way she was cradling her hand and he smiled timidly at her. Another surprise altogether. Lydia had never known Derek Hale to be timid about anything.

“You did that when you were sleeping,” Derek said, his voice barely above a whisper. “It looked like you really needed it so I…” He paused and seemed sheepish. “I didn’t want to let go.”

“Oh,” was all Lydia could manage for the rest of the short ride to Deaton’s place. She continued to stay silent as the pack (minus Kira and Malia, who Scott had decided probably should get some sleep as they didn’t even know Derek to begin with) filed out of Stiles’ Jeep with Scott and Stiles carrying a sleeping Derek into the Animal Clinic. Stiles had protested the idea, thinking they should just wake him up, but Scott said the guy had been through enough and to let him sleep. Considering the way Derek never woke up while he was being carried and placed on a cold metal slab in an Animal Clinic, Lydia was sure they had made the right decision. It appeared being deaged by a psychotic were-whatever Kate Argent was took its toll.

However, as Deaton looked over Derek, Lydia was starting to realise that maybe it wasn’t exhaustion that had pulled him to sleep.

“Wow as in I’ve seen this before and I know exactly what to do? Because that’s the kind of wow we were hoping for,” Stiles said. The anxiety in his voice was clear but then she could feel it surround them all in this moment.

“I think you might be overestimating my abilities,” Deaton said in return.

Lydia felt her heart drop to her stomach. She didn’t know Derek well and maybe at points, she hadn’t even particularly liked Derek, but he was linked to them in a way that transcended petty irritations. They all were - to each other. Tragedy and necessity and a deep human desire not to be alone had tethered all of them together. Lydia felt that for Derek and she didn’t want him to die.

She found herself reaching for his hand without much thought and being alarmed at the cool touch of his skin.

“He’s cold. Really cold.”

Deaton immediately moved to Derek’s head and began examining it but Lydia already knew the answer well before Scott had asked Deaton the question. He didn’t know if this was permanent. He didn’t know what to do.

Lydia had seen some unexplainable things in her short life but even she knew that this was something well beyond all their heads. What little hope she had, however, she held onto fiercely in her mind. They had to save Derek. Lydia wasn’t going to lose another. Not again.

“Someone should stay with you,” Scott said to Deaton, and just at that exact moment, Lydia felt Derek’s hand gripped tightly onto hers. She felt a sudden rush of warmth for _this_ Derek lying before her. He was seeking comfort just as she had done in the Jeep. Lydia owed it to him to stay.

“I’ll stay.” Lydia looked to Scott. “My grades are fine - despite missing a few classes.”

Stiles protested just as she had expected but eventually, the two boys exited the Animal Clinic, leaving Lydia alone in the room with Derek. Deaton had wandered back into his office to - Lydia hoped - do more research on what exactly had deaged Derek and if they could reverse it. She herself remained by Derek’s side and stared at the familiar yet strange face. Still with one hand gripped in his, Lydia used her free hand to tentatively touch his face, feeling the cold permeating on the surface of his skin. She couldn’t tell if he was getting worse or if the hand she had been holding was just beginning to warm because of her own touch.

She sighed, and unwilling to lose the connection, used her feet to pull a nearby chair over to her so she could sit down.

“You know you’re not so annoying when you’re unconscious,” Lydia mused out loud. “You actually even seem… _normal_ now.” She laughed at herself. “I guess I always assumed you came out of the womb all broody and angry.”

Silence met her and Lydia shrugged. She hadn’t been expecting a response anyway.


	2. Recognition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia probably knew better than anyone how it felt like to be terrified of your own mind, and maybe she tightened her grip because she empathised, or maybe she did it because the feel of someone’s hand in hers brought her a comfort she hadn’t had in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the lovely responses!
> 
> Also, disclaimer, in these introductory chapters, I'll be using some of the dialogue from the show and I just would like to say that of course I do not own them or Teen Wolf. It's only to set up these beginning bits but the rest will be all mine.

_Music played languidly from her speakers as Lydia sat cross-legged on her bed, a textbook open on her lap. She knew she didn’t need to study. Everything she was being taught right now in Chemistry she had already learned years ago but her eyes read over the assigned pages nonetheless. It never hurt to be extra prepared and in a strange way, the familiar words and concepts were like stories that soothed and calmed her._

_“Care for some company?”_

_Lydia glanced up and her mouth went suddenly dry. “How - how are you here?”_

_“What do you mean, silly?” Allison plopped down next to Lydia and smiled that great big toothy smile of hers. Seeing it again brought Lydia’s heart thudding rapidly against her chest and she clutched onto her book as if that could tether her to this moment forever. “I came through the front door.”_

_“But,” Lydia faltered, unsure of what to say. “How are you here with me? You’re…” She stopped speaking again and this time she let the silence drag out between the two girls. Allison looked curiously at Lydia as if she hadn’t a clue what was going on before her eyes then darkened and Lydia’s bedroom swiftly faded away._

_Her hands instead of clutching onto a textbook were deep in the mud. Blood caked each palm and Lydia screamed when she realised where it had come from. Allison was lying on the ground beside her and the blood was oozing from her chest._

_“Lydia,” Allison choked out. “You have to stay strong. You have to do that for me. Can you do that for me?”_

_Her sobs caused her words to stutter but she managed out: “I’d - I’d do anything for you.”_

_“Then run, Lydia. Run!”_

When Lydia came to, she was being held tightly against something as hard as it was soft. A contradiction that made very little logical sense to her. She moved cautiously and realised with quiet surprise that somehow in the middle of the night, she had fallen asleep on top of Derek’s chest and he had instinctively wrapped his arms around her. Their hands were still clutching tightly onto the other and like it had done before in the Jeep, the intimacy made her jump back as if his very touch could burn straight through her skin. 

Lydia dropped his hand and scooted away from Derek. 

Amidst the nightmares and her body’s bizarre gravitation towards the deaged Derek, Lydia was starting to feel like she was losing what little control she had left of her sanity. She wondered if she could refund her powers. A supernatural retail store of some kind. Lydia knew that was absurd but she was tired. Exhaustion echoed dully in her bones and Lydia’s head was in a constant state of flurry, like all of the atoms were charging at high energy around the inside of her brain.

“Oh, good, you’re up,” Deaton said with a smile. If he had seen Lydia and Derek embracing each other in their sleep before, he didn’t mention it, and for that, Lydia was grateful. There was nothing about that that she could properly explain.

Deaton took Derek’s wrist in his hand and felt for his pulse. 

Lydia waited for some time before the silence perturbed her. “What are you doing?” 

“His heart rate is alarmingly high,” Deaton said without looking at Lydia. 

She immediately moved from her chair and over to where Deaton was standing. She took Derek’s hand in hers and noticed something she hadn’t before. “He’s a lot warmer now,” Lydia said. 

“Lydia,” Deaton said. “I’m going to try something. I want you to keep holding his hand if that’s okay.” 

She nodded silently at the veterinarian and started absentmindedly rubbing circles along Derek’s hand. It was only now that Lydia noticed the furrow in between Derek’s brows, and wherever his subconscious had taken him, she knew it wasn’t anywhere nice. Lydia probably knew better than anyone how it felt like to be terrified of your own mind, and maybe she tightened her grip because she empathised, or maybe she did it because the feel of someone’s hand in hers brought her a comfort she hadn’t had in a long time. 

Deaton took out a scalpel and sliced across Derek’s forearm. The moment he made the incision, the skin began to heal itself. 

“That,” Lydia said slowly, “looked like it healed really fast.”

Deaton looked at her then with clear worry in his eyes. “Unusually fast.” 

“What does it mean?” 

“I’m not sure,” Deaton sighed before he abruptly straightened up. “Let’s try something else. Grab me a five millimeter syringe. Top drawer?” 

Lydia complied and followed Deaton over to where the syringes were being kept, but as they were gathering the supplies, movement behind them caused them both to pause. Lydia glanced warily at Deaton before turning around. Derek was now standing up and elongating from his fingers were long, sharp claws. As he turned towards them, his eyes glowed blue. 

“Derek?” Deaton called out but he didn’t respond. He only seemed agitated and terrified. His breathing was coming in short gasps and Lydia wanted to reach for him but the fear and tension in his body language made her stay where she was. 

“Derek, can you hear us?” Deaton tried again. This time, Derek looked up but it was not with recognition or any such emotion that Lydia would describe as good for them. He stepped forward and Deaton held out his arm to push Lydia backwards. 

She appreciated the gesture but this was Derek. Not a savage beast. At least she hoped not. 

“Derek, it’s me,” Lydia tried and something flickered in his eyes. “Do you remember me?” His shoulders sagged and his breathing started to slow. “I’m Lydia. We’re… friends.” It was a stretch of the word but at this moment, Lydia was willing to forego semantics for the sake of calming down an irate werewolf. 

Derek extended his hand towards her with his claws now retracted. It was a question of confirmation. He wanted to know - to _feel_ \- if she was who he thought she was and Lydia reached for him at once. His touch was warm and familiar and Lydia could feel him tighten his grasp on her, recognition dawning on him now, but as the calm came, it was just as quickly ripped away when Deaton moved. 

The action startled Derek and his claws came protruding out, cutting into Lydia’s skin. He growled at Deaton as he lunged forward and slashed at the man’s arm before disappearing through the swinging doors. 

Lydia rushed towards Deaton, ignoring the sting in her own hand, as she helped the older man up onto his feet. 

“You need to call Scott,” Deaton said to which Lydia nodded in agreement. She grabbed her phone from the counter and began furiously typing several text messages to Scott. When she received nothing in reply, she began texting anyone and everyone in her address book that they needed to get Scott to call her now. Thankfully, as still reigning queen of Beacon Hills, people listened to Lydia Martin. 

“Now you need to get that arm cleaned up,” Lydia returned her attention back to Deaton. “Before it gets infected.” 

“As do you.” 

Silence weighed on both of them as they went to work cleaning and bandaging each other’s wounds. She knew she had to wait for Scott and Stiles to get here but Lydia wanted to go after Derek herself. In spite of the current stinging in her hand, Lydia knew with absolute certainty that Derek wouldn’t hurt her and she also knew that he trusted her. For some unfathomable reason, he did and that made her their best bet to reach him. 

Scott and Stiles finally arrived at the Animal Clinic and Lydia quickly relayed to them what had occurred. “He didn’t recognise either of us and he looked like he was scared out of his mind.”

“But he recognised you,” Deaton said after finishing the bandage around Lydia’s hand and wrist. All three of them turned to stare at Lydia. “If I’m right and he’s not only younger in body but also in mind, how is that possible?” 

Lydia shrugged, unwilling to delve into that rabbit hole. “Maybe he recognised my scent or something.” When no one else said anything, she rolled her eyes and sighed. “You know because I was with him all night? He must’ve sensed that and decided that I wasn’t a threat.” It was a reach but now that she had said it out loud, it almost sounded plausible. 

“Okay,” Stiles said, drawing out those two syllables. “So if you’re a teenage werewolf and you’re scared, where would you go?” 

“A wolf goes back to its den,” Scott answered. “But Derek lives in a loft.” 

“Not if he’s a teenager,” Stiles pointed out.

Something ugly flashed across Lydia’s mind. “He can’t go back to the old Hale house,” she said. “The fire. There’s nothing there and if he’s still a teenager in his mind then…” The fear she felt now was not for herself but for the young Derek - fear of what he would find, of what he would come to realise. “He doesn’t know yet.” 

“It wouldn’t have happened yet,” Deaton clarified. “Not to Derek.” 

“We have to go after him,” Lydia said. “Before he finds out his entire family is dead.” 

“What do you mean ‘ _we_ ’?” Stiles asked. He was scrutinising her now and that only made Lydia sigh in exasperation. “Last time you encountered Derek, he nearly clawed your hand off.” 

“Oh please, that’s an exaggeration,” Lydia pointed out. “This,” she raised her hand, “is barely even a scratch. And like Deaton said, he recognised me.” 

“Lydia might have a point, you know?” Scott began only to have Stiles glare at him in bewilderment.

“You’re joking. You want to send the tiny redhead out to meet the big bad wolf?” Stiles asked. “Have neither of you ever heard of Little Red Riding Hood?” 

“That’s a fairytale, Stiles,” Lydia said and rolled her eyes.

“And so were werewolves!” 

“If there’s a better idea then we’ll go with that but maybe having him see a familiar face will help,” Scott said. Sometimes trying to reason with Stiles was pointless, especially when it concerned her safety. Lydia knew that his crush on her may be long over now but Stiles was still - and she suspected would always be - protective over her. It’d be sweet if it wasn’t so annoying. 

“I can handle myself.” Lydia put her hands on her hips and stared Stiles down. “I’ve handled all of you for years now, haven’t I? I think I can take on one scared teenage werewolf.” 

*********

Trudging through the woods in her high heels, Lydia was beginning to regret those words. Maybe she should have let Scott deal with Derek. He _was_ the Alpha now and that meant he might actually have more of a hold on Derek. At the very least, her precious heels wouldn’t now be destroyed by all this mud. 

Lydia groaned. It probably served her right trying to play the hero. She should have known better than to have bothered. Lydia wasn’t like the others. This altruistic nonsense wasn’t in her pedigree. She was naturally born selfish. 

As Lydia reached the Hale house, she found Derek kneeling in amidst the rubble and a familiar ache resonated in her chest at the sight. She walked towards him slowly as to not startle him but realised he would have heard her coming by now. 

“What happened?” 

Lydia stopped a foot away from Derek. Scott had said he would know if she lied so that was out of the question, but how could she tell someone that their entire family had died in a malicious fire? For all that Lydia had read in her life, there was no manual for this kind of thing. 

“I… shouldn’t be the one to tell you,” Lydia eventually said. It was a coward’s move and she knew it, but that was Lydia. She wasn’t brave. 

Derek stood up and turned to look at her. He was tall but not as tall as he was going to become, Lydia noted. Even without the years of pain and loneliness the older Derek had, there was still an intensity that clouded his eyes. 

“Who are you?” he decided to ask instead. “I feel like I know you.” 

“In a way, you do,” Lydia admitted. “But for the purposes of right now, I’m Lydia.” Out of habit, she offered him her hand. The formality of it seemed so silly as soon as she did it but now that it was out there, Lydia refused to withdraw her hand. 

Derek took it in his and Lydia inhaled sharply. Why did he have that effect on her? Surely she wasn’t so starved of affection that the slightest gesture from an attractive boy should send her body thrumming as it did. Derek looked down at their hands and then back up at her.

“I don’t know _you_ ,” Derek said slowly. “But I know this.” He raised their hands to gesture at what he meant. “It doesn’t make any sense.” 

“You’re telling me,” Lydia let out a breath. She was about to say more but Derek perked up, just like Prada would when she would hear Mrs. Martin come up the stairs. 

“Excuse me, I’m sorry but you kids can’t be here.” 

Lydia turned and narrowed her eyes. _Kids?_ She hated being talked down to by anyone. Adult or not, she was probably smarter than them and being referred to as a kid only made her irritable. 

The second officer swaggered over. His eyes glanced over her body in a way that made Lydia want to kick him where it hurts, and by the way Derek flanked her rear, she suspected that he had noticed that too. 

“Hey dumbasses, don’t you know what trespassing is?” the second officer asked. At least the first officer hadn’t meant to be a condescending dick but this one was really asking for the title in Lydia’s opinion. 

“This is my home,” Derek said through gritted teeth. He stepped forward and Lydia sensed the anger emanating from him. She placed a hand on his forearm, half part to warn him not to and half part to comfort him. 

“Nobody’s been here for years, kid. Now get the hell out of here.” 

“Hey, maybe a slightly gentler touch?” the first officer stepped forward and that’s when Lydia noticed that he wasn’t that much older than they were. He looked to be around his mid-twenties. The same age as Derek (or the older Derek). “Are you two alright? We can help you if something’s wrong.” 

“What happened to my house? Where’s my family? Where’s my mother?” Derek asked and with each question, his voice became more and more hysterical. Even her touch couldn’t pull him back down now and she knew that she should have been the one to tell him. Not these morons. This was now on her. 

“Alright, let’s go. Now.” 

The second officer went for Derek’s arm and tried to pull him away. Lydia in a moment of pure impulse slapped the officer’s hand off of Derek’s arm and put her body in between them. As if she could do anything to stop anyone. She was five foot two and clearly the smallest person here. 

“Get off of him!” 

“You don’t have to worry so much about your boyfriend, you’re coming too, missy,” he leered at her as he grabbed hold of her injured wrist. 

The pressure on the still fresh wound caused Lydia to scream out in pain. She should have kept her mouth shut but it had been instinctual and she hadn’t counted on Derek to act the way he did. He rushed forward and untangled the man from Lydia, twisting the officer’s arm to the point of breaking. 

“Derek, no!” Lydia cried out. “I’m fine. Look.” She showed him her wrist. Spots of blood appeared on the bandage but it was nothing concerning. “Derek, let him go.” 

In the second that it took for Derek to look at her wrist and then at her, the second officer had taken out a taser and jabbed it into Derek’s side. The electricity coursed through his body and Derek dropped to the ground in a heap. 

Lydia tried to move towards him but the first officer held tightly onto her arm and gently tugged her back. She stumbled into him and glanced up into his face. “I’m sorry about your boyfriend but it’d be better on both of you if you just come with us,” he said. “Please.” 

The sincerity in his voice was what kept her from screaming and lashing out at his dick of a partner and it was why Lydia allowed him to lead her to the patrol car and sit her in the backseat with Derek’s unconscious body. She moved to cradle Derek’s head onto her lap so the ride wouldn’t jostle him. She knew he was practically indestructible but the need to take care of him was still there regardless. Her fingers moved of their own accord along his cheekbone, tracing lines with the pad of her thumb over his face and running it down along his jawline. Lydia didn’t know if this was to comfort Derek or if it was to comfort her. Nothing about the way her body reacted to Derek made any sense recently, so she resolved to ignore it altogether.

Better to repress one’s emotions, her mother always used to say. 

Once at the station, the officers shook Derek awake and processed his fingerprints before handcuffing him to a chair. Lydia wanted to smirk at that but she pursed her lips instead and kept her gaze steady. She knew her rights and knew that they couldn’t do anything when they were both still minors, at least not without their parents present. 

“I really wish you would just let us go if you’re not going to charge us with something,” Lydia commented with an air of haughtiness to complete the stuck-up rich girl facade. “Otherwise I will have to get my father on the line and you would not like that.” 

“Shut up,” the second officer barked at her. Lydia narrowed her eyes at him and stuck her chin out. She knew how to play a role and this was one she had playing for seventeen years. 

Lydia could feel Derek’s eyes on her and she turned with an arch of her brow. “ _What_?”

“Nothing, you’re just…” 

“Amazing? Smart? What?”

“Hard to read,” Derek admitted and gave her a small smile. 

Lydia rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the two officers who were bent over the desk and whispering to each other. Something was up - of that she was sure of - but from where she was sitting, Lydia couldn’t quite determine what it was that had got both of them so worked up. She nudged Derek in the shoulder and whispered without taking her eyes off of the officers.

“What are they saying?” 

“They’re just looking at my photo,” Derek shrugged. “For some reason, they don’t believe I’m Derek Hale.” 

“Oh, huh,” Lydia murmured and knew that he could now hear her heartbeat racing. “How bizarre.” Of course they would look so confused. The photo that came up would’ve been Derek Hale as he was now, not deaged Derek Hale. How was Lydia going to get them out of this? 

“Hey, don’t I get one phone call?” she decided to call out. Maybe she could use it to let Scott and Stiles know what had happened and maybe… “Sheriff Stilinski!” 

Stiles’ dad walked towards her with a curious gaze and then turned it to the computer his officers were looking at. He glanced at the photo then towards Derek before his eyes bulged out of his skull. He did several double takes before walking slowly over to Derek and kneeling in front of him. Lydia remained tight-lipped and allowed him to process this information for himself. 

As Sheriff Stilinski walked back towards the desk again, his expression growing more bewildered by the second, Scott and Stiles burst through the door to the station. As soon as he saw them, he sighed and looked to his officers. “I’ll handle this.” 

He gestured for all three of them to come into his office, which left Derek still handcuffed outside alone. Lydia overlayed her hand over his for a brief second before following Stiles into the room.

“I want you to be honest with me. Absolutely and completely honest,” Sheriff Stilinski began as he sat there on the edge of his desk, a look of sheer exasperation on his face. “Have you been time-travelling?” 

“Woah, hey, what?”

“Because if time-travelling is real - you know what? I - I’m done. I’m out!” Sheriff Stilinski said, waving his arms around. “You’re going to be driving _me_ to Eichen House.” 

“We found him like that,” Scott said.

“And time-travelling isn’t actually possible,” Lydia muttered under her breath. “We’d have to be able to travel faster than the speed of light and we’re not even close to being there yet.”

Stiles gave her a pointed look and Lydia shrugged in response. She was just saying. 

“Where? Swimming in the fountain of youth!” Sheriff Stilinski was shouting now. If Derek was trying, he would be able to hear all of them, and even if he wasn’t, he probably at least heard that, but Lydia found it better not to aggravate the sheriff even further.

“No,” Stiles said sheepishly. “We found him buried in a tomb of wolfsbane, in an Aztec temple in Mexico, underneath a church in the middle of a town that was destroyed by an… earthquake.” 

Lydia placed her face in her hands and groaned. 

“You said you were camping!” 

“Yeah, we were!” Stiles said. “In - in, uh, in Mexico.” 

“Derek’s been aged backwards. We just need to talk to him.”

Lydia turned to look at Scott and felt trepidation creep into her heart. She couldn’t even begin to fathom the pain that it would cause Derek when he found out that his entire family (bar satan in a v-neck) have died. Part of her wanted to shield him from having to face that truth and another part of her - the more selfish part of her - wanted to leave him. Lydia didn’t want to have to see that kind of pain on his face and watch it as it marred him. As confused and scared as Derek was now, it wouldn’t compare to the heartache and misery that was waiting for him. The kind of misery that Lydia saw every time she looked at the older version of Derek. 

She didn’t want that for him. 

And maybe that’s why when Scott and Stiles went outside to talk to Derek, she stayed behind with Sheriff Stilinski. She could feel the older man’s gaze on her face and she knew he was doing that thing that Stiles always did: studying her. 

“Are you okay, Lydia?” 

“Peachy.” She offered him her most dazzling smile to which Sheriff Stilinski just tilted his head and furrowed his brow. Lydia stifled a sigh and continued to smile.“Just a little tired. Sleeping in a chair all night doesn’t quite fit into my nightly beauty regimen.” 

He laughed and nodded, unconvinced but willing to let it go. Lydia was grateful. Her emotional stability was not as it used to be and she didn’t need people poking at it. She was barely keeping it together as it was. 

“ _Sooo_ , we’re just going to take Derek back to Scott’s house, okay? Cool!” Stiles said as he poked his head through the doorway. 

Almost in unison, Lydia and Sheriff Stilinski said: “Wait!” 

Stiles poked it back in. “What?” 

“You can’t be serious,” Lydia said first. “You want to take Derek to Scott’s house where Agent McCall is staying? A man who has literally no idea about supernatural werewolves?” 

“Well, when you put it like that,” Stiles said and walked back into the office. Scott and Derek soon followed behind them. 

“Lydia has a point, boys,” Sheriff Stilinski said. 

“It’ll be fine. I’ll just make up an excuse - or something,” Scott offered and Lydia rolled her eyes at the two of them. 

“Okay, _fine_ , then what do you two suggest we do?” Stiles asked. “It’s not like we have that many options.” 

When no one suggested anything, Lydia sighed. “I’ll take him.”

All four heads turned and stared at Lydia.

“What? _They_ ,” Lydia jerked her head to the two officers outside, “already think Derek’s my boyfriend so we might as well continue the charade. It won’t look suspicious and my mom is hardly home these days anyways.” She could feel Derek staring at her but she kept her gaze fixed on Scott and Stiles. “Besides, Derek, you trust me, don’t you?”

He nodded and Lydia smiled in triumph. 

“See. Problem solved.” 

“I don’t like this,” Stiles said as he shook his head definitively. 

“You don’t have to like this,” Lydia pointed out with a frown. 

“But I _really_ don’t like this.” 

“It does makes sense though,” Scott admitted and shrugged. “Until we can figure out how to get Derek’s memories back, it’s probably better if he lays low and keep away from my dad.” 

“Scott!” Stiles all but shouted. 

Sheriff Stilinski put a hand on his son’s shoulders as what Lydia would presume was a warning for him to shut up. He then turned to her and said, “Okay but if anything happens, Lydia, you call us immediately.” 

She smiled at the older man. “I’ll be fine. How hard can it be to babysit a werewolf?” 


	3. Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sound of growling behind her had Lydia whirling around. She caught the last few seconds of Derek’s bared teeth and glowing blue eyes just as Prada went whimpering into another area of the house. She scowled darkly. 
> 
> “I would really appreciate it if you would refrain from scaring my dog.”
> 
> “She was trying to eat my shoes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're still reading this, you get a gold star because you're awesome! 
> 
> If you read and leave a comment, you get two gold stars!!
> 
> But either way, I thank you anyways! <3

Confucius once said that silence was a true friend that never betrays but Lydia had to ardently disagree with the man. Ancient Chinese philosopher or not, Confucius had obviously never spent an entire car ride home with an irate and brooding teenage werewolf. If he had, he might have whistled a new tune. Something along the lines of ‘silence amongst the supernatural may lead to possible apocalyptic eruptions in the future.’ It was quite wordy and probably didn’t sound as elegant or philosophical as Confucius’ words but it seemed particularly apt for the current situation. 

Pushing the gear into park, Lydia turned to look at Derek. The lines between his brows and the hard set of his lips appeared to have deepened. Whatever thought consuming Derek’s mind right now was one Lydia knew she had to bring him out of. She hadn’t asked for it, wanted it or even dreamed it would come to be but somehow in the past twelve hours, she had become Derek’s keeper. 

With an inward sigh, she placed her hand over his. The touch startled him and his eyes flashed blue for the briefest of seconds. She offered him a smile as if that could ever make up for what he would soon find out. “We’re here.” 

Derek looked to her house and back at her. “Is this where you live?” 

“When I’m not out rescuing strays,” Lydia smirked and pushed the car door open to exit the vehicle. With her purse hitched up her shoulder, she strutted towards the front door, giving her hips a little extra sway than she would if she were alone. He may be upset and about to face utter and complete devastation but there was no reason why she couldn’t make him smile just for a little while. 

As the door to her house clicked open, Prada came bounding forward, yapping away at her feet. Lydia scratched behind her dog’s ear before moving further into the house. The vacant driveway had already indicated to her that Mrs. Martin was not home. She could very possibly be away all night if her classes over in Beacon County ran late, which Lydia fervently hoped it did. She didn’t need to answer questions she had no answers to - even if Mrs. Martin was the most blasé mother a girl like Lydia could ever ask for.

The sound of growling behind her had Lydia whirling around. She caught the last few seconds of Derek’s bared teeth and glowing blue eyes just as Prada went whimpering into another area of the house. She scowled darkly. 

“I would really appreciate it if you would refrain from scaring my dog.”

“She was trying to eat my shoes,” Derek said but at least he had the decency to look bashful for growling at a miniature toy dog. 

“She was _trying_ to play with you,” Lydia told him with an exasperated roll of her eyes. What was it with boys and always trying to assert their dominance when it wasn’t needed? 

“Sorry,” Derek mumbled.

“Uhuh,” Lydia sighed. She gestured for Derek to follow her. They made their way up the stairs quietly. Only the sounds of her heels tapping on the hardwood floor could be heard echoing around them. Being alone in the house used to freak her out when she was younger but after the divorce, Lydia grew accustomed to solitude and even learned to cherish her own company. At least that was until Jackson waltzed into her life and Allison not so far behind. Now with her firmly ensconced within Scott’s pack and Allison’s death leaving a giant hole in her heart, Lydia was beginning to hate it again.

The ground shook underneath her feet. It propelled Lydia into the bannister and left a dull ache underneath her ribcage. She was about to turn to reach for Derek when the world swirled around her like someone had taken a straw and started stirring. As the tremors ceased, Lydia’s knees buckled and she collapsed onto the floor but instead of meeting sandalwood, her bare legs were greeted with squishy wet mud. 

Lydia’s heart dropped to the pit of her stomach as she glanced from right to left. The familiarity itched in the back of her mind. She had been here before. These woods. They were in Beacon Hills but in a part unknown to most of the town. How Lydia knew this was as elusive to her as her itch but still, she did. 

The air crackled like the sound of static from trying to change radio stations. The noise was deafening and Lydia placed both hands on either side of her head. It grew louder and louder until it stopped without warning and a shimmering figure appeared in front of her. 

“Lydia!” the figure screamed but its voice sounded far away. She strained to hear it. “Lydia!” it tried again. “Please… listen…” The static was back and threatening to drown out the figure’s voice. “I don’t have much…” - _crack_ \- “time… Lydia, please… Lydia!”

Her eyes snapped open and she inhaled sharply, taking in Derek’s earthy musk with a mix of the lemon-scented air freshener that Mrs. Martin uses indiscriminately. His hands cradled her face while his thumb smoothed out the creases in her forehead. 

“Lydia,” Derek breathed, the worry evident in his green eyes. “Are you okay?” 

Her throat was as dry as if she had been starved of water for days. However, even without Derek having to tell her so, Lydia knew that wasn’t the case. She knew what happened and she wished she could answer his question with the air of confidence she normally tried to maintain, but the truth was Lydia _wasn’t_ okay.

She hadn’t been for a long while.

“Would you -” Lydia coughed. “Would you believe me if I said I was just peachy?” 

Derek shook his head with a wry chuckle. “Not even if I couldn’t hear the rapid beating of your heart right now.” 

She placed a hand over her chest and he was right. The speed of her pulsating heartbeat could rival that of a hummingbird who could reach up to 1260 beats per minute. Lydia exhaled slowly and pushed Derek gently away from her. His hand instantly shot out to grasp hers and Lydia allowed him to pull her to her feet. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Lydia eventually said once her equilibrium had returned to normal. “It’s not important.” 

“I think suddenly fainting like that counts as important,” Derek said. He looked none-too-pleased with her nonchalance over the incident but what did he want her to say? That she was a banshee with unpredictable connections to the netherworld? Even to a werewolf that would be absurd. 

Besides, Lydia was fine now. Her heart rate was descending and her head was clearing. “I’m going to take a shower,” she announced. His displeasure grew. “There’s a menu on my nightstand to the local pizza place. Order what you want but get me a diet coke.” His displeasure grew again until she could hear a low sounding growl emitting from the back of his throat. 

Lydia ignored it and the look on his face before she turned and walked straight into her bedroom. Abrupt and cold was how she knew how to handle things. Even older Derek knew that; it was time younger Derek did too. 

The warm shower did little to ease the tension in her shoulders or the new worries that now occupied her thoughts. No amount of time could rectify that. All it was doing now was turning her pale skin a soft shade of pink from the heat. Lydia turned off the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. Condensation clung to her mirror and she used the back of her hand to wipe away the fog. 

Lydia screamed as she stared straight into Allison’s light brown eyes. She scrambled back from the mirror and circled her arms around her body. The door splintered apart as Derek came barrelling into the bathroom. His eyes shot to the mirror then the shower before landing onto Lydia in the corner. His arms came around her and he pulled her soaking and all into his chest.

“Shhh, shhh, it’s okay,” Derek murmured into her hair. Lydia didn’t even realise she had started crying but the tears were streaming rapidly down her face and landing onto Derek’s shoulder. “I’m here, Lydia. You’re safe.” 

For a while, they stayed as they were. It didn’t matter that Derek didn’t know what happened. The specificities were irrelevant. In this moment, her silence spoke louder than Lydia ever could and if that’s what Confucius had been trying to tell her then she understood now. Silence could never betray her where her words could. Silence could offer her a hand when she felt at a loss of what to say. 

But Lydia’s sudden comprehension of ancient Chinese philosophers wasn’t what was astounding. It was the simple but not so insignificant fact that Derek understood this.

Rubbing at her now dry eyes, Lydia extricated herself from Derek. He left his hands around her shoulders and studied her face. “You don’t need to tell me anything,” he started. “But if you do want to talk, you know I have a supernatural sense of hearing.” 

Lydia cracked a smile and chuckled. “Okay.” 

“Good.” Derek was smiling now too and his hands trailed down her arms till they grabbed hold of her hands. “Now, c’mon,” he said as he pulled her up. “The pizza came when you were in the shower and I don’t know about you but I hate cold pizza.” This made Lydia smile again. “Oh and I think your mom called.”

“What?” she asked wide-eyed. “What did she want? No, wait.” She put up her hand. “What did _you_ say?”

“I… uh,” Derek’s smile had turned sheepish. “I just said I was a friend and that you were in the shower. She said to tell you she’d be spending the night at Beacon County and I think she thinks I’m your boyfriend.” He shrugged. “She seems really nice though.” 

Lydia exhaled and rubbed again at her weary eyes. “She thinks every guy I bring home is my boyfriend.” 

Without missing a beat, Derek asked, “do you bring home a lot of guys?” 

“Eat your pizza, Wolf Man,” Lydia told him with a smile. She grabbed her more conservative nightgown from the drawer and quickly changed in the bathroom. When she came back outside, Derek was already on his second pizza.

“It’s funny but it feels like I haven’t eaten for days,” Derek said conversationally but it wasn’t as funny as he might have thought. No one knew what Kate had done to Derek and it was entirely plausible that in that period of time while he was lying unconscious in her cave of horrors, he was starved of food. Lydia wondered if werewolves could live longer than humans without eating or drinking anything. The average human could survive approximately three days but other more exceptional (but not supernatural) humans have lived up to eight to ten days. It wouldn’t be impossible for Derek to have been there unconscious and without food or water for two weeks. 

Thinking about it, however, made Lydia angry. Kate Argent was a royal bitch and the illogical part of all this was how she was somehow blood-related to Allison. 

“You should eat something.” Derek’s voice pulled her back to the present and she nodded in silent thanks, taking a seat beside him on the floor. “I hope just plain pepperoni is okay.” She nodded again with her mouth full of pizza. “My mom loves the kind with pineapples on it. Isn’t that disgusting?” 

A stab of guilt and anguish echoed in her chest. Lydia swallowed and tried to play her part in all of this. Scott and Stiles were counting on her to keep Derek’s trust so tomorrow they could find a way to return his memories to him. “That’s a crime against food.”

“It is!” Derek laughed. “Me and my sisters always make fun of her for it.” 

“My sisters and I,” Lydia corrected absentmindedly.

Derek set on her a pair of incredulous eyes. “You’re just like my sister, Laura. She likes to correct my grammar too.” 

“Good grammar is a sign of intelligence,” Lydia pointed out to him. “Your sister is a smart woman.” Except she _was_ and not is, but it wasn’t Lydia’s job to tell him that. Her job was to keep an eye on him. 

“You sound just like her,” Derek snorted. “Hey, are you gonna…”

Lydia waved her hand. “Have at it.” She stretched out her arms and yawned. “I think I’m going to turn in early anyways. It’s been a long day. You can…” Lydia paused as she looked at him. 

“I - I’ll sleep on the floor,” Derek offered, taking her hint in stride. “Don’t mind me. This is your home.” 

She grinned. She was empathetic but a girl’s gotta have her beauty sleep afterall. “Okay then.” Lydia went and grabbed a sleeping bag from the cupboard in the hallway and an extra blanket. “You can use these. The TV’s downstairs if you want to watch and…” Lydia leaned forward and kissed him softly on the cheek. “Thank you for… you know.”

Lydia would never think it possible if it weren’t happening right before her but Derek Hale was actually blushing. It was faint but the pink tinges to his cheek were evident and it made him look younger than he already did before. “Right, sure. Uh… Good night, Lydia. Sweet dreams.”

Sleep followed easily and it lulled her gently through most of the night until the diet coke she had consumed finally caught up with her. It didn’t even occur to Lydia that tonight was the first dreamless night since Allison died that she’s had till she was sitting bleary-eyed on the toilet seat. A euphoric toothy grin split her face in two and Lydia almost bounced her way back into the room to wake Derek up just to tell him so. He would surely think she was certifiably insane so Lydia resolved to staring elatedly at her reflection. There was fatigue in the crinkles at the corner of her eyes and a dark discolouration under them that was proof of the toll her nightmares had been having on her but amidst it all were the bright hazel eyes she had inherited from her mom. She could almost recognise the girl staring back at her this time.

Still smiling, Lydia quietly opened the door and stopped. Cold air rushed towards her, lifting the edges of her hair and billowing it out behind her. A shiver slid icily down her back and she suspected it had nothing to do with the temperature in the room and everything to do with the leering gaze of Kate Argent standing in her bedroom. 

“ _You_ ,” Derek spat at her. Lydia’s heart thudded harrowingly. “You lied to me!”

“Derek, we were -”

But he cut her off. “I _trusted_ you.” 

“Please,” Lydia stepped forward but she made no move to grab him. She was no threat to Kate and she doubted she could make Derek stay when he clearly didn’t want to, but maybe she could make him understand. “Don’t go with her, Derek. Look at me. You _know_ me, remember?” She stretched out her hand with her palm facing upwards just as he had done in Deaton’s office. It seemed so long ago now. 

For the longest second, Lydia watched as Derek warred with himself. Doubt and desire flashed in his green eyes before they were replaced with pure hatred. 

“I _don’t_ know you, Lydia,” Derek said slowly with dark narrowed eyes. “And you don’t know me.” 

With a blur of motion, Lydia was left standing in the middle of her bedroom cold and alone. 

She really screwed this one up.

*********

If Lydia hadn’t felt like shit already, Stiles would certainly be doing a great job of making her feel even worse.

“How could you lose him! He was in your bedroom!” 

She grunted in response.

“Why didn’t you lock the window? Or why didn’t you just -”

“Stiles, _shut up_!” 

With a glance at the now quiet Stiles, Lydia saw that he had fallen into a startled silence rather than one of obedience because his eyes were bugging slightly out of his head as he stared at the normally timid girl in the backseat. 

“Can’t you see she already feels terrible?” Kira went on. “Just stop it. Please.” 

Stiles fixed his gaze back on Lydia and something in her face must have made him repentant for the past five minutes. “Oh,” he said, treading lightly now. “Geez, Lydia. I’m sorry. You know you probably kept the truth from him longer than Scott and I would’ve, right?”

Lydia nodded. “I know that.”

“And if it sounded like I was questioning your competence, I totally wasn’t,” Stiles continued now putting up both of his hands in the universal sign of surrender. “I get a little worked up sometimes.”

“Try all the time,” Lydia told him. She saw Kira stifle a giggle in the rearview mirror. “But your apology is accepted.” 

Stiles let out a breath of relief and smiled toothily at Lydia before his brows creased in confusion. “Hey, I thought we were going to get Scott and Malia from Derek’s loft.” 

“We are,” Lydia said with equal amounts of confusion. 

“Lydia,” Stiles pointed out the windshield. “We’re at a gas station.” 

“What?” She realised with abject dread that he was right. It was happening again and she knew it. Her powers were still as unpredictable as ever but she was beginning to understand them now. Lydia was led here. By who or what, she didn’t know but she had to stop. 

Lydia pulled up inside of the gas station and got out slowly. 

“Woah, woah, where are you going?” Stiles rolled down the window and poked his head out from inside. “We’re on a kind of deadline here, Lydia.” 

She ignored him and padded past the gas pumps towards the back of the convenient store. When she finally stopped in front of a metal door, Lydia’s hand hovered just over the handle. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting to find but when she finally pulled it open, her hands flew to her mouth and she screamed.

Kira and Stiles came running over immediately with Stiles wielding his baseball bat like a sword. Both stopped dead in their tracks as they too saw the inside of the bathroom. Stiles retched and turned his face away while Kira grabbed hold of Lydia’s hand in shock or comfort she wasn’t sure but she squeezed Kira’s hand nevertheless.

“We have to… I mean we have to call the police,” Kira was the first to speak. “Right? Isn’t that what people do?” 

“Normal people maybe,” Stiles said. “But in case you haven’t noticed, Kira, we’re not exactly normal.” 

“I’ve noticed,” she mumbled. Her grip on Lydia’s hand lessened but she still held on. Lydia didn’t mind it for now. She needed the comfort too. 

“So what do we do then?” Lydia asked. “You know it’s Kate. It practically screams homicidal bitch all over it.” 

“Okay, okay,” Stiles started. “Here’s what we do. Lydia, take a photo and send it to Scott and we carry on with our intended plan. We go to the loft, pick those two up and go find Derek before Kate sinks her claws into him. No pun intended.” 

“There was a little pun intended, wasn’t there?” Kira asked with a knowing smile.

Stiles smiled back facetiously. “Yeah, there was a little pun intended there.”


	4. Transformation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You seriously need to find something better than a baseball bat,” Lydia said.
> 
> Stiles looked to his bat then to her and frowned. “What’s wrong with my bat?” 
> 
> “Oh I’m sure you’re going to do some real damage to a werejaguar there,” she told him with a patronising pat to the shoulder.

If someone had put a decomposing body and a couple dozen dead fish inside of a blender then that would be close to what Lydia was smelling right now. The pungency of the dead gas station attendant was thick even from a couple feet away but now that Lydia, Kira and Stiles were stepping inside of the bathroom, it was positively tear-inducing. 

“I may have a 4.0 in Biology but,” Lydia said as she tried not to touch the walls or allow her precious heels to touch any more blood than was necessary, “even I haven’t seen some of the body parts on these walls.”

“Oh god,” Stiles murmured. “I knew I shouldn’t have had Mexican for dinner.” He made a gagging noise and shook his head as if that could get rid of the smell. 

Lydia moved further inwards so she could take a couple photographs over the body with Kira sticking closely to her. “Call Scott,” Lydia said, pressing the back of her arm up to her nose. “I sent him the photos.” 

Stiles nodded as he retreated a few steps out of the bathroom. “Hey man, did you - uh god, is the smell getting worse or is it just - sorry, okay so you saw the photos.” Stiles had half of his shirt pulled up to his nose. “Wait, Derek _knew_ Kate? What do you - oh, that’s disgusting.”

Lydia’s eyes shot to Stiles’ face. Derek knew Kate. But how? 

“Okay, okay, see you there.” Stiles pocketed his phone and looked over at Lydia and Kira. “So according to Peter, Kate’s taking Derek to the high school. Something about a vault. Scott said to meet them there.”

“So that means we can leave? Thank god!” Kira said as she quickly jumped across the bathroom and ran out. Lydia followed suit and waited till they were all back inside of her car with the air conditioner on full blast to ask Stiles the niggling question in the back of her mind. 

“What did Scott mean when he said Derek knew Kate?” Lydia asked. She kept her eyes on the road and remained as impassive as she could. 

“Peter said that the two,” Stiles paused to shudder, “were _biblical_.”

“What?” Lydia broke her short-lived impassivity and glanced at Stiles, who was now sitting in the backseat, through the rearview mirror with disbelief.

“You know… Getting physical. Boinking. Bumping uglies,” Stiles said. “Doing the -”

“I get the picture,” Lydia snapped with an irritable frown. 

“Didn’t he also get with your old teacher who tried to sacrifice everyone?” Kira asked.

“Yup,” Stiles said, popping the ‘p’ sound. “Ms. Blake. As crazy as she was hot.”

“Are you serious right now?” she turned her judgement onto Stiles, who shrugged. 

“He sure has a type,” Kira mumbled from beside Lydia.

“Yeah, the murderous type,” Stiles agreed. 

Lydia remain tightlipped however as they both continued to talk about Derek’s illustrious love life. She didn’t know why it was so grating to hear about. What Derek Hale did with his life was none of her concern. She wasn’t responsible for who he chose to sleep with, even if she thought he had horrible taste in women, but she _was_ responsible for what happened to Derek tonight. It was her fault he was out there with Kate. 

If she had been a braver person, she would have told him the truth from the very start and maybe they could’ve avoided being out (once again) at two in the morning on a school night. 

And maybe Derek wouldn’t hate her as much as he did - not that Lydia blamed him for it. For whatever inexplicable reason, he had trusted her and she had used it to her advantage. If Lydia was Derek, she’d hate her too. 

The soft touch on her elbow caused Lydia to jump in surprise. Without having to glance to her side,, Lydia could feel Kira’s concerned eyes watching her.

“We’ll get him back, Lydia,” she said softly. “Don’t worry.”

“I _know_ that,” Lydia said. “Kate obviously needs him to get to that vault. If she wanted him dead, he’d already be dead.” And she would feel it. Thankfully, her mind was clear and there was no scream waiting to rip out of her. No one was going to die tonight. 

Kira nodded and sank back into the backseat. Lydia mentally slapped herself for belatedly realising that her tone had been a little too sharp with her. With one hand placed firmly on the steering wheel, she reached over to grip hold of Kira’s hand. “Thank you,” Lydia said with a genuine smile. She would have to learn to reserve her snippiness for the other members of the pack. Kira didn’t deserve it. For all that they had seen, somehow Kira still retained her goodhearted nature and Lydia wouldn’t be the one to trample on that. 

In a way, Kira reminded her of Allison. The two had the same endless capacity to love and forgive even in spite of the world they both came from. 

It would seem that Derek wasn’t the only one with a type. Scott was also evidently predictable in his choices of girls. 

“If you two are done having a moment, Scott says to meet them at the front of the school,” Stiles chimed in with a smirk sent specifically for Lydia. She scowled at him. If he thought she was suddenly getting soft then he had another thing coming. Lydia was still Lydia Martin, Queen Bitch of Beacon Hills High.

She steered the car into the school and parked right in front of the school sign, but the others were nowhere to be seen. Lydia, Stiles and Kira all turned to look at each other before each of them slowly and very warily exited the car.

“Should I be worried?” Stiles asked. “Because too late, I’m really worried.” 

“Take it down a notch?” Lydia rolled her eyes in exasperation. “Maybe they aren’t here yet.” 

“Yeah, maybe they’re… caught in… traffic?” Lydia and Stiles arched a brow at Kira who shrugged innocently. “Okay, stupid suggestion,” Kira muttered with a bashful smile. 

“Well Scott said he was already here,” Stiles raised his phone and shoved the screen into Lydia’s face. “ _Seeee_. So where is he? Where’s Malia? And… Actually, I don’t really care about Peter. I would be pretty okay if they accidentally left him behind.” 

“You and me both,” Lydia muttered. The memory of having Peter invading her mind elicited a shiver down her spine. There was no one she hated more than Peter Hale.

“Maybe they saw Derek and went inside?” Kira said with a hopeful lilt to her voice. Lydia could however tell in the way that she was fidgeting with her katana that Kira was more worried than she let on. “I’ll call Scott. Should I call Scott? No, uh… Maybe you should call Scott, Stiles.” 

Stiles chuckled and gave her a knowing grin as he lifted up his phone. He had barely dialed in the number when a loud growl caught all of their attention. 

“Any chance that’s your girlfriend, Stiles?” 

But Stiles was already running towards the sound. Lydia sighed and followed him with Kira close behind her. They ran through the tunnel, following the sound of the growling, but then it abruptly stopped. The ensuing silence became deafeningly loud in the night air and both Stiles and Lydia paused, unsure of where to go next. It occurred to Lydia then that they were all running towards an angry animal without having the faintest idea of what that animal could be. She knew that logically that this was probably one of their less than stellar ideas - right up there with the rescue mission to save Derek in Mexico - but Lydia was beginning to come to terms with the knowledge that logic and the supernatural rarely go hand in hand. 

“Where do we -” Her words were cut short as Kira shot forward without a second look towards them. “Kira, wait!” Lydia tried to call out but it was useless. Kira was already up the stairs and gone from sight. She turned to Stiles instead and noticed the bat in his hands. Lydia rolled her eyes. “You seriously need to find something better than a baseball bat.”

Stiles looked to his bat then to her and frowned. “What’s wrong with my bat?” 

“Oh I’m sure you’re going to do some real damage to a werejaguar there,” Lydia told him with a patronising pat to the shoulder before running towards where she had seen Kira go. She raced up the stairs two at a time and made it there just in time to see one of two giant beasts thwack Kira on the side of the face, the impact throwing her backwards to where Scott and Malia were lying. Stiles ran over to Malia and placed a hand over her injured leg and whispered something to her that didn’t make her altogether very happy. 

“I know I’m supposed to be the genius here but if anyone has any suggestions, I’m all ears,” Lydia said to her pack as she stood over them. All four them blinked back at her and she sighed. This was great. Just great. 

The beasts advanced on them and Lydia swallowed hard. She couldn’t feel a scream coming but that didn’t mean that they weren’t all in some serious danger. 

“Stiles,” Lydia said. “If you’re not going to use that bat, could you at least toss it over?” He did without questioning her motives, which was just as well because frankly, Lydia had none. She caught the bat and raised it somewhat pathetically towards the skull-clad beasts. 

Another growl pierced through the night and Lydia saw a pair of blue eyes race towards them. Derek leaped through the air and caught one of the beasts with his extended claws. Having decided that Derek was a much more imminent threat than Lydia, the two beasts turned towards him and the pack watched as Derek repeatedly lunge at his supernatural assailants. He was fast and calculative in his movements. Even at his younger age, Derek was still a dangerous opponent to have and Lydia suspected that it was because he was _born_ a werewolf, not created. Where Scott and the rest had to grow accustomed to their new supernatural powers, it had been apart of who Derek was all throughout his life. This fascinated Lydia in a way that made her wish she could just appreciate watching him but the fear churning inside of her sobered her from any such thoughts. 

“Derek!” she cried out as one of the beasts sent Derek flying back into the lockers. Horror gripped her as blood flowed from a deep gash across Derek’s brow but when Lydia blinked, it was already starting to heal abnormally fast. 

Before Derek could recompose himself, however, it grabbed him by the neck and readied its other arm. In that split second of panic and fear, Lydia jumped forward and hit the beast across the head with all of her strength, but by the angry growl she received as a response, she had only managed to annoy it. 

Lydia backed away slowly, one step at a time, her grip on Stiles’ bat tightening. When one of them growled at her, she tried to hit it again but it caught the bat easily in its claws and broke it into two pieces. Lydia swallowed hard.

“Lydia!” Derek shouted. His voice pulled her eyes away from the advancing beasts towards his glowing blue eyes. “Run!” 

_“Lydia, run!”_

Allison’s voice echoed inside of Lydia’s mind and her hands gripped either side of her head to quiet the scream, but her feet were already backing away as if of their own accord. They at least - and thankfully - seemed more inclined to take the advice of both Allison and Derek than her mind was, but Lydia had only backed away a few feet when her body came colliding into Scott’s. His hands steadied her and they silently watched as Derek tackled not one but both of the beasts to the ground. 

“Did anyone - did you -” Stiles started, the incredulity growing as his voice rose in hysteria. “Oh, c’mon! Someone tell me they saw that too!”

“We saw, dude,” Scott replied, his tone just as incredulous. 

With each ferocious swipe, Derek’s face began to change and the older Derek flickered in and out of focus, as if fighting for control over his own body. Lydia stood slack-jawed with her pack. Now she had seen some supernatural phenomena unexplained by science but this was even beyond her imagination. 

Derek was thrown to the ground with the two beasts moving towards him but a loud howl caused them both to turn around and retreat towards it. 

“Kate,” Malia said instantly. Lydia figured the werebitch was controlling them somehow. 

“Derek, buddy,” Stiles stepped forward with Scott flanking his side. Lydia stayed behind with the other two girls. “You alright, man?” 

It was then that Lydia noticed the broadness of his shoulders and when he stood up, even though he was faced away from them, she knew. 

Derek Hale was back. 

*********

By the time Lydia got back into her own bed, the sun was already beginning to rise, leaving her with only an hour’s sleep. If there hadn’t been an important test today then Lydia would certainly have tried to stay home. School hardly taught her anything new anyways but she still wanted to maintain her 4.0 GPA. How else was she going to get into a good college and get the hell away from Beacon Hills?

Although - with that thought now in her mind - Lydia felt uneasy and guilty over leaving. She knew her reason for wanting to go because she didn’t want to live in a town that constantly reminded her of her dead best friend was justified, but being apart of a pack was for life. Lydia felt responsible for the safety and wellbeing of her friends. She would never forgive herself if she left and something awful was to happen to either one of them. 

But could she really stay after high school? Could she really _live_ in Beacon Hills for the rest of her life? 

“Malia, stop chewing on that pen, you’re going to drive me insane,” Lydia snapped as the constant gnawing from her socially challenged friend pulled her from her revery. 

Malia pulled the highlighter out from between her teeth and sighed. “But I don’t get _any_ of this! At the rate I’m going, I’m just going to be highlighting everything in red!” 

“Then next time you go over to Stiles’, you might want to study instead of making out with him,” Lydia pointed out with a smirk. Kira blushed and quickly looked down at her books. 

The three girls had been sitting in the library for the better part of the hour, _trying_ to study, but all three of them were distracted. Last night’s events were still fresh in their minds and by the looks of the bags under all of their eyes, no one had gotten a decent night’s sleep either. 

“So Derek really doesn’t remember anything?” Kira asked after another minute of silence. Lydia looked up from her reading and shook her head. “Not even when he was staying with you?” 

“Not even then,” Lydia mumbled and returned her gaze back onto the book but not really reading anything in front of her. After Derek returned back to his normal age, they discovered that someone other than Kate Argent had been in that vault and had stolen all of the Hales’ saving bonds. With Derek and Peter preoccupied with who could do that, Lydia hadn’t had a chance to talk to him, but she wondered if it wasn’t for the best. Maybe they both should just forget about what had occurred and go back to being whatever they were before. 

It would certainly ease Lydia’s guilt. 

But was it wrong not to want that? Was it wrong that in those short few hours spent with Derek she had actually grown to enjoy the company of the werewolf? Or that for whatever inexplicable reason had made their connection so strong, it been just as much of a comfort to her as it had been for the younger Derek? 

“I smell Stiles,” Malia announced as she perked up. 

“That’s gross,” Lydia pointed her pen at her friend, which made Kira giggle, but Malia’s nose was impeccable - at least when it concerned her boyfriend. Both Scott and Stiles came bounding over to their table with Stiles just a little more jittery than normal. She redirected her pen and pointed it at Stiles. “What’s with him?”

“Someone gave him coffee,” Scott said with a sigh before turning a shy smile towards Kira, sitting down opposite her and beside Lydia. “Hi Kira… and er, Malia. Lydia.”

“Hi,” Kira mumbled. 

Lydia rolled her eyes heavenwards and yanked Stiles by the edge of his shirt into the other seat beside her. “You, of all people, should not be drinking coffee.” 

“I _know_ ,” Stiles began. “But I was so sleepy!” His eyes then fell on Malia’s work and he pulled it towards him. “Malia, this is all red!” 

She growled. “Because I don’t get history! Why do we even have to learn it? It’s in the past, right? Well, it should just stay there then.” 

“Because the past informs the present,” Lydia replied easily. She was used to these protests from Malia by now. “If we don’t know about our past, how can we avoid making the same mistakes in our future?” 

Malia crossed her arms and huffed. “Doesn’t look like anyone learns though.”

“Yeah,” Lydia chuckled. “No one ever does.” 

“So Scott just got off the phone with Derek,” Stiles said in order to change the topic. “Guess how much those saving bonds actually amount to?” 

“How much?” Kira asked. 

“No, no, guess!” 

“ _Stiles_ ,” Malia growled again. “Just tell us.” 

“Alright, alright! You guys are no fun,” he pouted. “117 million dollars!” 

A mixture of disbelief and curse words came spouting out of the three girls and the ruckus inevitably caused the old coon that worked in the Beacon Hills library to promptly kick them all out. 

With her books pulled tightly into her chest, Lydia followed her friends to the lawn out front where several of her classmates were meandering around. The five of them found a grassy knoll and sat down. 

“Are you sure that’s right?” Lydia finally asked once they were out of earshot. “I mean that’s a… that’s _a lot_ of money!” 

“Why do you think Peter is pissing himself over this?” Stiles said with a facetious smile. He was evidently enjoying Peter’s distress. Lydia had to admit she did a bit too.

“Derek’s not handling it much better either, man,” Scott pointed out - and Lydia’s enjoyment was abruptly squashed. “Although he just seems generally pissed off at everything.” 

“Dude, as if that’s a surprise,” Stiles said, slapping his friend on the shoulder. “This is the Sour Wolf we’re talking about. When is he _not_ pissed off about something?”

“True.”

Lydia refrained from rolling her eyes again. “So what are they going to do?” 

“They’re convinced Kate had something to do with it so they’re going to try to track her down,” Scott informed them. 

“That’ll end well,” Lydia murmured. “Because anything to do with the werebitch is always going to be sunshines and daisies.” Feeling uneasy all of a sudden, Lydia gathered up her books and stood up. “I have to go to class. I suggest you all do the same if you want to graduate this year.” 

Lydia purposefully walked a little faster to avoid having to speak to any of her friends. There were twenty-four ribs in a human rib cage and Lydia felt like all twenty-four were constricting tightly around her heart, trying to squeeze out all of the oxygen pumping through it. Something was wrong, very wrong, but she didn’t know what it was. There was no scream waiting to break away from her, yet she could still sense something was coming. 

When she reentered the high school, Lydia broke out into a run towards the nearest bathroom and quickly splashed water onto her face. 

“Get a grip, Lydia!” 

Her hazel eyes stared back at her. Droplets of water slid down her pale skin and Lydia pulled out a tissue from her purse to dab at her face. She then moved her hands upwards to fix the braid she had done up this morning after being too exhausted to curl her hair. Lydia was so transfixed in what she was doing that at first she had barely noticed the change but when her eyes glanced away from her hair, Lydia jumped back startled. 

Her eyes were no longer green and blue but were now a light amber brown. The braid she had just spent fixing was now lying limp by her shoulders - a dark brown colour. Lydia’s hands shot up to her face as it slowly began to morph into someone else’s. 

_Allison’s._

The scream didn’t come this time. Lydia was too shocked to move or say anything, so she just stared and Allison stared back. A dozen people could have walked into that bathroom and she wouldn’t have noticed them. The shock and relief of seeing her best friend in front of her was enough to occupy all of Lydia’s senses. She wanted to stay there and memorise every single feature of Allison’s face... And that would have been her plan until Lydia noticed that Allison was soaking wet from head to toe. She opened her mouth to ask what happened but Allison beat her to it as her lips started to move. No sound came from the mirror but the words she mouthed were more than discernible to Lydia.

_Help me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi all! sorry for the longer wait for a new chapter (i was on holiday - wooh wooh!) but here it is. i hope you guys liked it!
> 
> i know there's a distinct lack of derek and lydia interaction in this chapter but don't you worry, more is to come ;) 
> 
> also, thank you sooooo much for the responses thus far. the dydia fandom is a small one so i honestly never expected that much but you guys have all been so wonderful in commenting and it really gives me all the warm fuzzies so seriously, thank you! <3 
> 
> if you want to find me on tumblr, you can look me up at: smoaknmurdock :)


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